| (no subject) |
[Jan. 23rd, 2007|05:57 pm] |
Runty/Mei mei/Mark the rat has gotten worse. Her infection is so bad that her tears (or whatever) are turning red. She gobbled down all the chocolate I gave her, and she snuggled in my sleeve like normal, but she was wheezing and sneezing. This makes me very, very, very sad.
Also, I am going to drop Sam's class, 'cause I don't want to deal with it right now.
Today is a sad evening. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 7th, 2006|04:05 pm] |
HAH! IT'S SNOWING!
I have never seen Ryan so fucking happy.
This IS the best time for a cigarette.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAH
I LOVE THAT JOY CAN BE RAGE! AHAHAHHAAHAHAH
YES! |
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| The long con? We are the long con. |
[Dec. 2nd, 2006|08:23 pm] |
Dear Society,
We are going no where but down. There could be lots of eras to point to, but none of them are really any different. I could blame it on any era, contemporary or classical, but it wouldn't matter too much now would it? I could say it was the eighties. I could say that it started with the Gen Xers. It started when we stopped getting married, when we stopped having children, stopped having dreams, and started getting divorces and 401(k)s.
Racism. Globilization. Religious propaganda.
Sedation.
A sense of being someone, something. Creating a niche. Not reaching out. The need to be coddled and praised.
"Paying it Forward
Doing good deeds for others with no need to be paid back"
Doing good deeds to post on the internet. Myspace stars. Wars we can't win. Wars we don't fight. Wars we ignore.
Bright. intelligent people who strive to be on VH1 and talk about what isn't there anymore. But it's still there. Escapism. Escape the past, escape the present, ignore the future.
Berate and belitte - others and yourself. Others because they scare and worry you. The ignorant ones don't want to be taught. The hopeless don't want your help -- or they want it too much and want nothing to do to better themselves. The intelligent ones are just as apathetic as you. Nothing will change.
We are the American dream. Things don't get better than this, and yet, we are hoping, praying, clutching our icons of crosses, heroin, and beautiful celebreties waiting for the revolution. We swear we will be a part of it when it happens. When it happens we'll get up and raise our fists. When it happens we'll burn our bridges and move forward. When it happens. But until then we will wait. We will go no where. We will drink ourselves stupid and beg for someone to hate. Or we will hate ourselves. We will look for someone to shove our faces in our own shit, and if no one will, we will do it to ourselves. We will sell ourselves short. We will demean ourselves. We will claim it's so others don't hurt us, but we like the pain. The pain is something real. So we think. Our emotions have been usurped, sterlized, and sold back to us. What we think is love, hatred, or fear is just what Universal Studios wants us to think it is. Universal Studios, our government, our counterculture, our insecurities, our short fallings.
Our short fallings should push us forward. Our acknowledgement should spring us into action. Yet, we let our new, our intellectual, our profound needs fester, rot, and die. We need more, we want more, but we don't reach out.
We are stuck in our own stagnant and seditary ways.
And we like it this way.
We like complaining. We like hating others. We like hating ourselves. Our goverment, our bands, our parents, our peers, those below us, those above us, those we don't know, those we love.
Anger and resignation is all we have left.
But I want there to be a glimmer. I want there to be cold chills when we realize that nothing is different. I want a revolution. I want it to be a live podcast. I want it on the evening news. I want it to be on the internet, our shows, our music, our books, our faces, our hearts, our souls.
When will it happening? Is it now? Is our anger and resignation the beginning? Are we but a string in the tapestry and we cannot see the rust is being knocked off the cogs and that we are pushing them into motion with our piss and vinegar because we are too close? Or are we just killing ourselves and writing about it in our blogs? Are we so connected that we have isolated ourselves? Do we really hate ourselves or are we ignorant to ourselves? Is there an American dream or is it dead? If it is alive and we are unhappy, why aren't we changing it? Why do we say we care, when we sit on our duffs and complain? How can we change things when we don't know what the end is or when we don't trust our own methods, our own feet.
Our own feet -- they're what we walk on.
But we aren't walking anywhere. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 27th, 2006|09:42 pm] |
Warren Wilson ala Princeton Review
#1 Reefer Madness
#15 Most Politically Active
#1 Students Most Nostalgic For Bill Clinton
#14 Most Beautiful Campus
#3 Birkenstock-Wearing, Tree-Hugging, Clove-Smoking Vegetarians
and knoxville is .... 9 University of Tennessee--Knoxville for "Alternative Lifestyles Not an Alternative"
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 29th, 2006|01:40 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | eels - i like birds | ] |
Today at work:
I got cussed out. For no fault of my own.
Yay douchetools.
(I should have told him to shut his cockhoslter and thrown my beer bottle at his head.... next time) |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 21st, 2006|03:59 pm] |
Bradshaw adopted me hardcore. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 20th, 2006|12:26 am] |
Write a little paragraph about your name, why you chose it, what it means to you, etc. (From RaeAnn)
So, real simple. Originally, it was bootsofcombat because, well, my girlfriend wears combat boots. Which makes her better than yours. Then shit happened, and I changed it to this. Why? Because I like Buffy too much. And I was looking through a site of Buffy/Angel nicknames and Cordelia had soliloquy girl. It was from Buffy being like blablabla okay soliloquy girl. And I thought it worked for livejournal considering that this is all long rants from and to myself (mostly). And then for the first layout, I had Cordie and the theme was a quote of hers that was "I think it, I say it. It's my way." |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 19th, 2006|12:43 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | office | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  busy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Dexter Freebish - My Madonna | ] |
Registration - Anti-Climatic
PHI*394*F00*PHI ST:German Idealism
Cobb, W TTHS 02:30pm - 03:50pm
WRI*212*F00*AES Creative Writing:Fiction
MWF 01:00pm - 02:20pm
ENG*339*F00*LIT Modernism
Matin, A TTHS 09:30am - 10:50am
ENG*343*F00*LIT Milton
Bradshaw, D MWF 11:00am - 12:20pm |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 9th, 2006|02:42 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | ashley's bed | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  swell | ] |
| [ | music |
| | No Doubt's Return to Saturn | ] |
So, Rules:
Never go to France
Necks are not toys
Don't touch my wife
Don't die when I'm in the bathroom
So, last night was Hillycat's birthday. It was pretty swell. Ryan got beligerant. He and Hillary played bloody knuckles. Right over my head. And we ate lots of goldfish. The whole event was spectacular. Melissa has some pictures; I look forward to seeing them.
In other news, we did our stats project this morning. First off, we were totally fucked, but then we redid it and it was great.
Now we're going to the pond to swim.
And we cleaned the room. It looks groovy.
Clarence is in Florida with the girls. I think she's gonna have a spectacular time. I'm gonna miss her this week, but I look forward to the stories.
My feelings for the summer/spring/the day:
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 5th, 2006|11:19 am] |
Finished my paper. Morgan helped me out with the structure and flow which was very good. And now we're going out to lunch for work day. And then we deep clean the office. With the paper off and done with, I feel a great burden lift. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 5th, 2006|12:38 am] |
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"Fuck gravity! Scruffy lanky guys make the world go round!" |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 31st, 2006|01:53 am] |
So ---
I went to my concert. It was everything I hoped so and so so much more.
Mebbe I knew every song.
Mebbe I sang along to every one.
Mebbe I flailed and danced to every one.
Mebbe I need to get a new bra.
Mebbe Ben Nicholas has my old one.
Mebbe I hugged Ben. Twice.
Mebbe I kissed him.
Mebbe he kissed me back.
Mebbe this was the best thing ever and I can die happy. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 23rd, 2006|10:58 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  groggy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Wilco - Red-Eyed and Blue | ] |
I've had a headache for the past two days. Yesterday it was bad. Today it's worse. So much worse that I don't even want to complain about it. Sometime I need to go get medicine, but I'm waiting until I don't think I run off the road. It's in my left eye socket, the back of my head, behind my ears and up at the top of my forehead. The worst part is that is I try to look at something that is not directly in front of my face, my eyes get fuzzy and double-vision. This makes classes rather difficult. And I end up shutting my eyes in an attempt to make things better and then I just look like I'm asleep and taking notes (which I do, but not these past few days).
Someone, please, scrape out my skull. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 20th, 2006|01:47 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  wet | ] |
So, we're back at school and it's the first dayof spring.
..........and it's hailing like a bitch. sup with that?
Car's registered and where it belongs.
And I got a 93 on Bradshaw's paper. Hells yes. |
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